What My Daughter Taught Me About Presence
The photo of my daughter carries more than a memory. It’s a reminder of how becoming a mother has been both one of the greatest triggers and one of the greatest gifts of my personal growth.
Through our interactions with our children, we discover so much about ourselves. They act as mirrors, reflecting back our fixed ideas, our cultural imprints, and the truths we tend to overlook.
And if we allow ourselves to stay open – to look beyond what we think we already know – we find an entire world of growth waiting for us.
At The Stable
When I grew up in Shanghai, horseback riding was not a common activity for children. So when my French-born daughter fell in love with it, I didn’t fully understand the pull.
During the summer break, she went for her Galop 3 exam and asked me to watch.
My first instinct: What time will you jump? (The exciting part, right?)
But due to timing, I could only be there at the start.
So I watched her get ready.
I saw her chatting with her friends, walking confidently to find her horse, brushing it gently, speaking softly to it, lifting the saddle onto its back (the horse was taller than her), adjusting each strap with care, and helping another smaller girl with her saddle.
I was in awe.
In those simple, quiet moments of preparation, I saw values I hope to pass on:
- Autonomy
- Responsibility
- Empathy
- Patience
- Mutual support
Then I watched her ride – and even more life lessons appeared:
- Managing fear
- Balancing control with letting go
- Staying in the present moment
- Posture, presence, and balance
These are the very things I explore daily as a coach.
And, let’s be honest – as a human being.
It turns out, the most powerful part wasn’t the jumping.
It was the presence. The connection.
What began as her passion became a classroom for me – a living reminder that growth often hides in the spaces we overlook.
Parenting has shown me again and again that it’s not just about raising a child.
It’s about raising ourselves, side by side with them.
What unexpected places have become classrooms in your own journey?